More than a Sore

At this very moment Bruv is sitting in the study with a permanent marker and a bit of cardboard, doing a PD assignment on genital herpes – his tagline is “MORE THAN A SORE”, which I think is pretty good. When I escaped from my essays to get a glass of water and saw his homework, a wave of nostalgia hit me. Ah, PD ... those bludgey periods every week in P1 and P2 (both of which smell like feet), doing role plays about drugs and modules on ‘risky behaviour’. I still remember in year six when we got a different teacher to talk to us about STIs, and she came in with a whole bunch of equipment and sheets and proudly announced, “I’m just going to give you all some STIs ... I MEAN SHEETS ON STIs! SHEETS!"

Later on we blew up a condom and left it on our teacher’s desk as a surprise. That was the type of 11-year-olds we were at Wilkins Primary. We had the best time, too.

Anyway so then I was sitting in front of my Stalinism as totalitarianism essay with my rainbow lollies and tissues littering my desk (I’m a little ill, thanks immune system) and I thought, I could go for a PD assignment right now. I’d actually give anything to look up statistics on the internet, maybe Google image some pictures of cannabis, then Word Art a heading – font size 100 – to stick down on a sheet of cardboard (coloured to go with the theme).

Unfortunately I don’t have the time. I do, however, have the time to write to you, apparently! Isn’t that lovely? I will now proceed to go back to work; I am just a little screwed for my trial examinations. J

Although I can’t help but wonder why they thought it necessary to teach 11-year-olds the whole condom-on-the-banana thing.

Love you like “homework”.

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